I got a job at a newspaper place, bundling up papers and getting them to carriers. The hours are from "goddammit-go-to-sleep" to "ungodly-in-the-morning". Then again, first job isn't supposed to be all that good, right?
I also have a girlfriend now. Honestly, she's one of the only aspects of my life that is making me smile at this point.
As for creative things, I did some work on a fanfic and came up with some original characters, but as for videos (i.e. the reason some of you would be reading this in the first place) there's been a large snag. Because of my lack of ideas and my friend's busy schedule, the script to the Rugrats Go Wild review is as of yet unfinished. We keep telling ourselves that I would be free to review whatever I want after we get the Clown story arc squared away, but considering how long it has taken us, I have ceased to really give a damn. This dumb idea that I so foolishly decided to bring into the show has been an anchor on my productivity.
And maybe that whole thing in Germany added a dash of depression, and school and work are now taking up free time, but that would imply that I was productive even with free time.
I have written a script, and have started some other scripts, but I haven't been able to finish them. Same with a lot of other writing projects.
I've toyed around with the idea of just doing some random videos, like AMVs or edited non-review vlogs or something, but the inspiration hasn't struck me.
But really, what use is there in complaining about? I guess to get the frustration out, but that still won't make it go away. And someone out there would read this and tell me to stop being such a goddamn pansy, I assume.
I'm not sure what to do. Either just do it, in spirt of my feelings, and create videos that would seem forced anyway. Could someone be able to tell, or is that why it's called 'acting'?
Need to finish a paper for Tuesday. Gonna drive up to visit my girlfriend after I get off from work. We've both had a weird year, to put it lightly.
Goodnight.
You don't sound like a pansy. You sound like someone whose brain in just fried right now. Maybe you should go on hiatus for a couple of months. Give your mind a break from the video reviews. You sound like you need to take a break from just constantly worrying about whether you can put the videos up or not. If a couple of months is too long for you, then you can just take a month to cleanse your mind! Focus on going to anime conventions, catching up on your favorite TV show, reading a cool book. Just do anything that does not pertain to your video reviews right now. TAKE A BREAK! You really need it.
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